What I’ve learned as a breast cancer survivor

When I first arrived at the fabulous Hawaiian location for our family vacation, I was overwhelmed with happiness and joy. Aside from the obvious reasons — being on a much-needed trip and unplugging from everything — I was feeling deep gratitude to be alive.

I had been planning this trip for five years. It was the bright light at the end of a dark, long tunnel, called breast cancer treatment.

In 2017, I sat in a doctor’s office with a radiology technician asking me if I had a loved one in the waiting room. My heart sank, but my gut knew something was not right the second I felt an enlarged lymph node in my armpit a few weeks prior. I was my own health advocate and made an appointment. My intuition was shouting, and I was listening. 

I was diagnosed with an aggressive Stage 2B breast cancer that had spread to my lymph nodes. I was age 39 with two young sons. My husband and I sat in that room together trying to take in the surreal news. It was also Valentine’s Day — our least romantic one to date. 

My entire world got turned upside down. I was young, healthy and unsuspecting of a two-centimeter tumor that had been growing deep in my breast tissue. I drove home the day of that radiology appointment overwhelmed with anxiety. I thought of my kids, wondering if I was going to see them grow up.

One in 8 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime. I was the ‘one.’ I also tested positive for the BRCA 1 gene mutation. I have been described as an overachiever, but this was certainly not how I wanted to prove that adjective. The gene mutation put me at a high risk of breast and ovarian cancer. Knowing about the gene mutation is significant in order to make informed health care decisions.

The next few years were a whirlwind of appointments, treatments, surgeries, tests and scans. I felt like I was hit by a tsunami.

I had walked into Moores Cancer Center at UC San Diego Health many times before the day of my diagnosis. I work on the UC San Diego Health communications team. I had spent hours in and out of the building, gathering story ideas to help promote the extraordinary work of the health system. 

On March 20, 2017, I walked in as a patient for my first day of chemotherapy. I wore pink boots and even managed a smile. I learned how strong I was that day. I transformed from worrier to warrior. I learned about true empathy as I looked around at the other cancer patients receiving chemotherapy. There is always someone facing a harder challenge. 

I have experienced firsthand the most comprehensive and compassionate care by remarkable multidisciplinary teams at the Comprehensive Breast Health Center at UC San Diego Health. I had team members wipe my tears and hold my hand.

My body went to war, and I had an army of experts throughout the entire hospital system to get me through it.

After nearly two years of treatment, involving 10 chemotherapy sessions, a double mastectomy, 28 radiation sessions, a hysterectomy and breast reconstruction, there is no evidence of cancer. My husband and I learned that I was officially in remission on our wedding anniversary. It made up for Valentine’s Day.

I am now in the chapter of survivorship. I have learned that there is a new set of emotions and obstacles that come on this path. I have learned how to be in the present.

As we honor October as Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I am passionate about sharing my story to educate and provide hope and encouragement to those newly diagnosed. I have learned that these reminders can save your life:

• Mammography is the most effective tool for screening for breast cancer 

• Examine your breasts and your armpit areas 

• Know your family cancer history

• Talk to your doctor about genetic testing and counseling 

• Be your own health advocate 

• If the disease is detected early, the survival rate is 98 percent

When I now walk inside UC San Diego Health’s hospitals and clinics, I can’t help but have mixed emotions and flashbacks of some of the hardest days of my life, and some of the most celebratory.

During the early days of my diagnosis, a survivor told me I would one day find the gifts from the journey. I didn’t understand at the time. In fact, I almost didn’t believe her. I have learned she was right.

My life is more vibrant. I have a bucket list to remind me that none of us are guaranteed another day.

I think of cancer every day, however, it no longer consumes me. It motivates and inspires me. 

My greatest accomplishments are being a mom and a cancer survivor. Both have taught me the most valuable lessons that I infuse in all aspects of my life. 

I hug my kids with an extra squeeze now, knowing I have been given the opportunity through life-saving care to watch them grow up. 

I started planning our Hawaii trip to celebrate my five-year cancer free milestone while I was going through the thick of treatment. 

As we swam in the warm ocean looking at sea turtles surrounding us, I took mental photos. My breast cancer journey led me to that special moment with my husband and kids. I will remember it forever. 

I have never been so elated to cross something off my bucket list.